Sardar Joke Sms..
A man:Santa where were u born
Sardar: punjab.
Man: which part??
Sardar: oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in Punjab".
A sardar was asked to write essay abt father but he studied only on friend. so he replaced the word friend as father,he wrote essay like this i have lot of fathers my neighbour is my best father,finally he ended as a father in need is father in deed!!
Sardar1: can u spell the word which contains more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar2: "POST BOX"
Banta and Santa were walking outsideWhen the Santa said "Oh, look at the dead bird".
Banta looked skyward and said "Where, where?".
Q.Why can't Banta Singh dial 911?
A. He cannot find eleven on the phone....!
A sardar , was missing his passport size photo in a crowded bus.
he was searching & found it just below the lady and told
"pls madam lift ur saree i want to take photo"..!!
A dog was chasing a Sardarand the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar:I have aAirtel card but still hutch network is following!!!
4 Hitech Sardar Inventions:
1) Waterproof Towel
2) Solar Powered torch
3) Book on how 2 read!4
4) Pedal powered Wheel chair!
Nurse Boli: mubarak ho sardarji aap papa bangaye
Sardar: Meri wife ko nahi bolna... Mein use surprise dunga!
Q.How did sardar try to kill the bird he caught?
A.he took it to the top of the building and dropped it from there to die!!
Sardarji is irritated of jokes made on him. he goes to his wife and says ''tell me the joke in which i'm not involved''
wife:- i'm pregnant!!
A sardar gone for an interview for the post of a detective
Manager: who killed gandhiji?
Sardar thx for giving me the job, i will investigate..!
Harbhajan Singh gets married.
During suhag raat he asks his wife"r u a virgin ?"
she replies:" kar di na sardaron wali baat,Spinner ko kabhi nayi ball mili hai...!
Sardar joins army, given AK 47.
He's puzzled.
Asks major, Sir, yeh bandook ki nalli samne rakhun ya ulta?
Major: kisi bhi taraf rakho, faida desh ka hi hoga!!!
Banta ped pe chada to upar baithey Bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaya?
Banta: Apple khane.
Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Banta: Pata hai, Apple saath laya hoon.
Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long!
Santa falls in luv with a nurse...
After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her:
"I luv u sister."
Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai?
Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.
Santa went out to buy an Indian flag.The shop owner gave him the flag.
Guess what did he ask next...
.
.
.
Ismein aur colour dikhayiye!!!
Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?
Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?
Santa: Birla cement.Banta: Kyun?
Santa: Kyunki is Cement mein jaan hai.
Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.
Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai,
hum 4 dost... 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.
Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.
Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?
Dress code 4 a party - BLACK TIES ONLY.
Banta goes for the party & is surprised to see that the other guests are wearing SUITS also!
Santa was caught for speeding and went before the judge.
The judge: What'll you take 30 days or Rs 3000.
Santa: I think I'll take the money.
A lady asked Santa, the shopkeeper: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja...
Q: Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth.
A: Because Doctor has advised him: 'Aaj Light Khana hai!'
Q: How do you recognize Santa's son, Pappu, in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.
Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u'll die.
Santa: U'll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform?
Santa saw a beautiful gal... he went and smooched her.
Gal - What are you doing?
Santa: Law, 4th semester from Punjab University.
Banta was driving down the highway past a sign that said, "Clean Toilets 8 Kms.
"By the time he drove eight kms he had cleaned 14 toilets.
Santa: I’m a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What’s he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
At a football match ground.
Santa: Ye log ball nu foot kyun maar rahe ne?
Boy: Goal karan lai.
Santa: Paar ball tan pehlan hi gol hai hor kinni gol karangey.
Q: A Man asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains?
"A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."
Santa and Jeeto were on an African Safari when a lion sprang out of nowhere & draged Jeeto with his jaws.
Jeeto: Shoot him, Shoot him!
Santa: I can't. I ran out of film.
Banta sent sms to Santa: Bhejnewala mahan, padhnewala gadha.
Santa got angry and replied: Bhejnewala gadha, padhnewala mahan.
Once Professor Santa asked a plumber to come to his college. You know why?
Because he wanted to check from where the question paper is leaking.
Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause when he got out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out.
Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."
Sardar: punjab.
Man: which part??
Sardar: oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in Punjab".
A sardar was asked to write essay abt father but he studied only on friend. so he replaced the word friend as father,he wrote essay like this i have lot of fathers my neighbour is my best father,finally he ended as a father in need is father in deed!!
Sardar1: can u spell the word which contains more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar2: "POST BOX"
Banta and Santa were walking outsideWhen the Santa said "Oh, look at the dead bird".
Banta looked skyward and said "Where, where?".
Q.Why can't Banta Singh dial 911?
A. He cannot find eleven on the phone....!
A sardar , was missing his passport size photo in a crowded bus.
he was searching & found it just below the lady and told
"pls madam lift ur saree i want to take photo"..!!
A dog was chasing a Sardarand the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar:I have aAirtel card but still hutch network is following!!!
4 Hitech Sardar Inventions:
1) Waterproof Towel
2) Solar Powered torch
3) Book on how 2 read!4
4) Pedal powered Wheel chair!
Nurse Boli: mubarak ho sardarji aap papa bangaye
Sardar: Meri wife ko nahi bolna... Mein use surprise dunga!
Q.How did sardar try to kill the bird he caught?
A.he took it to the top of the building and dropped it from there to die!!
Sardarji is irritated of jokes made on him. he goes to his wife and says ''tell me the joke in which i'm not involved''
wife:- i'm pregnant!!
A sardar gone for an interview for the post of a detective
Manager: who killed gandhiji?
Sardar thx for giving me the job, i will investigate..!
Harbhajan Singh gets married.
During suhag raat he asks his wife"r u a virgin ?"
she replies:" kar di na sardaron wali baat,Spinner ko kabhi nayi ball mili hai...!
Sardar joins army, given AK 47.
He's puzzled.
Asks major, Sir, yeh bandook ki nalli samne rakhun ya ulta?
Major: kisi bhi taraf rakho, faida desh ka hi hoga!!!
Banta ped pe chada to upar baithey Bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaya?
Banta: Apple khane.
Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Banta: Pata hai, Apple saath laya hoon.
Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.?
Santa: Very long!
Santa falls in luv with a nurse...
After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her:
"I luv u sister."
Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai?
Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.
Santa went out to buy an Indian flag.The shop owner gave him the flag.
Guess what did he ask next...
.
.
.
Ismein aur colour dikhayiye!!!
Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?
Banta: Marte waqt aadmi ko kya dena chahiye?
Santa: Birla cement.Banta: Kyun?
Santa: Kyunki is Cement mein jaan hai.
Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.
Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai,
hum 4 dost... 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.
Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.
Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?
Dress code 4 a party - BLACK TIES ONLY.
Banta goes for the party & is surprised to see that the other guests are wearing SUITS also!
Santa was caught for speeding and went before the judge.
The judge: What'll you take 30 days or Rs 3000.
Santa: I think I'll take the money.
A lady asked Santa, the shopkeeper: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja...
Q: Why Santa is standing below the Tube light with an open mouth.
A: Because Doctor has advised him: 'Aaj Light Khana hai!'
Q: How do you recognize Santa's son, Pappu, in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.
Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u'll die.
Santa: U'll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform?
Santa saw a beautiful gal... he went and smooched her.
Gal - What are you doing?
Santa: Law, 4th semester from Punjab University.
Banta was driving down the highway past a sign that said, "Clean Toilets 8 Kms.
"By the time he drove eight kms he had cleaned 14 toilets.
Santa: I’m a proud father. My son is in medical college.
Banta: What’s he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
At a football match ground.
Santa: Ye log ball nu foot kyun maar rahe ne?
Boy: Goal karan lai.
Santa: Paar ball tan pehlan hi gol hai hor kinni gol karangey.
Q: A Man asked Santa, "Akal badhi ya bhains?
"A: Santa bola, "Pehle date of birth to batao."
Santa and Jeeto were on an African Safari when a lion sprang out of nowhere & draged Jeeto with his jaws.
Jeeto: Shoot him, Shoot him!
Santa: I can't. I ran out of film.
Banta sent sms to Santa: Bhejnewala mahan, padhnewala gadha.
Santa got angry and replied: Bhejnewala gadha, padhnewala mahan.
Once Professor Santa asked a plumber to come to his college. You know why?
Because he wanted to check from where the question paper is leaking.
Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause when he got out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out.
Petrol ke rate badhne par Santa bola: "Menu koi farak nahin penda. Pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon."
posted by Vikram at 8:09 PM
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